Pillar 2: The Romantic Relationship
How to actively cultivate love, great sex, respect, kindness, and joy
In this section, we open with uncovering what dynamic you’re currently playing out … maybe you’re stuck in a business partner role, or a parent/child dynamic. Maybe one of you is more like the other’s therapist or life coach … regardless, two dynamics can’t exist at the same time. If you are stuck in one of these, you can’t be in a LOVER dynamic.
We spend a lot of time in this pillar to discuss how to talk to each other, because if it’s one thing we’ve experienced, it’s how damaging someone’s tone and treatment can be in the moment and compounded over time. If you frequently hear people say, “Your partner is so nice! What a kind, fun person!” while you are thinking, “If you only know how much an asshole they are,” you will really benefit from this lesson. Most couples use their partner as their punching bag and are their worst selves around them. We believe in saving the best for your partner. After all, they are supposed to be the most important person in the world to you.
We talk about the strategies, time management, and communication needed to create space to be lovers. Yes, this includes dating, sex, and romance. And no, we don’t think scheduling sex is a good idea. However, we do have some other amazing strategies that will make you feel deeply in love and attracted to your partner again.
A note on monogamy: We believe that all couples get to make their own decisions on who they have sex with, as long as both people feel GREAT about it. We are in a monogamous relationship and plan to be so for life. We believe that you can have the hottest, best sex of your life with your lifelong, monogamous partner. It’s super edgy and vulnerable. Doing a striptease and then getting up the next morning to make breakfast for your kids, is A LOT. Is it easier to let your freak flag fly and just sneak out in the middle of the night, yep! Is stretching yourself to be vulnerable with your partner and mind-blowing, sacred, edgy sex while also holding the mundane details of life together an incredible soulful experience? Hell yes, it is!